Yours truly...

No. I do not want to make friends with you. Fuck off.

Once in a while, I tend to do some facebook requests clean up and that includes my friends request list.

Don’t you hate those requests without any messages? The pictures are too tiny and you can hardly see who the fuck it is. What’s worse is when people use some pictures that do NOT show their face or show off their pets or whatever.

How the heck would I know who you are? There are a thousand and ones Sarahs, Janes, Marys, Pauls, Michaels and Johns!

So what I usually do is send a message to check if I know him/her. I like to keep my facebook friends really friends-only. It’s not an open account where I’ll add everybody and anybody. Facebook is super stalkerish la. Why would I want to add anyone that I do not know to snoop around anything me and my friends do?

So I sent this message to a few people that I think I may know. (I’m a lazy arse. I can’t be bothered to send to all 300 requests. Best way for me to ignore your friend request is when you add me without sending a personal message. Grrr)

One of the many replies I got. Someone who just wanted to be friends. Oh wait. He’s attracted to my profile? Sure or not? Here’s part of my profile…

Looks interesting doesn’t it?

So I decided to reply cordially.

Isn’t it obvious that I’m not interested? It’s such an easy way to back away with one’s pride left intact by just replying “Ok, thanks.”

But he decided to try again.

Grrrr. I do not want to meet sleazy old men from Facebook!

Nabei. Laoniang does NOT have a sad existence lor.

Second try at brushing Mr Obnoxious off.

Third try! Please do not stand around my well. I’ll plant some booby traps there. At least he was kinda cordial, can’t blame him for trying…. unlike the next fella.

Bloody asshole right? What such character? Just because I do not want to make friends with sleazy balding men who are at least 10 years older than me trying to get to know random chicks on Facebook?

For a soon to be 35 year old Sales person in AIA, he sure does not know how to sell himself. Maybe he just wants to make friends on Facebook to peddle his insurance stuff. Remember this incident?


What’s your worst experience with such friends-wannabes? Share them with me!

20 thoughts on “No. I do not want to make friends with you. Fuck off.”

  1. Wah lau so weird and funny (but not ha-ha) these guys. And bloody hell I’m soon to b 35 as well and luckily I don’t look like that! Woohoo. 🙂


  2. their facebook routine: try to befriend girl. try to pick up girl. girl rejects. try to insult girl.

    oh. seen that. 😉 u’re so sarcastic i love it. HAHA. (heart)


  3. I don’t have any people wanting to be friends with me. I wonder if has anything to do with my profile that says I enjoy stalking pretty girls….


  4. OMG that RICHARD CHUA added me like twice before la!!! i also replied and asked if i know him and he gave a similiar answer.. copied and pasted TWICE when he added me both times, months apart. WTH.

    i HATE it when pple add me without messaging. it’s just rude. at least when they message they provide some sort of amusement. pft.

    some guy i asked if i knew him replied: “Nope”



  5. Oh.. I am so sorry. I seem to be one of those irritating people. :S

    I just dropped a message in facebook. it’s ok if you don’t reply or something.

    P.S. pls don’t moderate this comment. I am ashamed :S My name is Mari Talakhadze.


  6. Hahahaha.. That’s hilarious.

    As of now, I’ve got 151 friend request that I don’t know who are they. I just ignore and leave the requests hanging there.. 😛


  7. My personal rule of thumb is don’t add if I don’t remember the person or if it’s most likely a one-time meetup (meaning no chance to get to know person better). Think messaging them is quite a painful process as proven in the examples you’ve provided!


  8. I feel ya lol.

    Well, there’s this one time this asian dude from melbourne chatted me up on facebook. At first he seemed genuinely friendly and all until he asked me this, “Do you have a BF?”

    WTF (shocked) i thought. However i asked that if he had mistaken me for a girl and clarified to him that i’m a GUY. He answered, “I know. Btw, you look cute. Can send me more of your pics please?”

    OMGWTFBBQ. I made it sounded obviously to him that I’m STRAIGHT and that i’m okay with just being a friend but don’t hit on me. Unfortunately he was persistent so in the end I had to block him lol.

    That’s my story hahaha.


  9. You seriously rock! I hate people that random add friends. They seem like some… loner or what…


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