at least let me see the rainbow after de rain…

how do u knoe when to give up? and when to hold on?

wat if u give up and u will regret it for life?

what if u hold on and it juz waste ur time, ur love and money?

dilemma. i need to talk and yet i cant.

i havent breakdown yet though i nearly did today.

i wun.

perhaps i need a good cry….

but i onlie used to cry to him…

fuck la.

i dun need tis.

anyway, on a sidenote… i like the idea of de integrated resorts…

hahaha. means more jobs for ppl like me.

being short tempered tis days… juz keep mulling over him…

im sorry i cant keep up… coz all i wanna do is wonder and figure things out.

i promise myself. if i get tis job. its a sign. coz tis job is one of my dream jobs.

its juz tat… it is sometimes hard to let go…

i tried my best to keep the relationship going…

and now, i found out its not worth it…

juz feeling emotional…

one week has passed.

7 weeks left. my deadline is set.

if he can take dat amount of time. so can i.

why bring me up so high? juz to drop me down all the way?

men are jerks. they want the companionship and not the commitment.

if u neva intended to stay long or know ur the type not able to stay long. WHY THE HELL U GET INTO THE RELATIONSHIP?

why bother chasing me? when i said no, why go on and on and tried getting me?

and u can change ur feelings for me in like a few days or weeks?

ultimate betrayal man.

is it too much to rethink it over incase it was juz the distance/work getting to u?

arent what we went thru or how long we have gone thru worth juz a lil for u to rethink it over?

im like bouncing between hope/sadness/anger.

ppl say that its betta to have loved and loss then neva loved at all.

i wished i have neva met u.

great. now i can’t sleep. and i have to get up at 6.30am tomolo.