Sorry but I couldn't resist, doing a rebuttal 😀 ROAR! So here's the real rewrite. Weee!
When a man goes on a date he wonders if he's gonna get lucky. A woman will of course know, but in the end, sorry but it's still the guy who's lucky.
-- Pick Up artiste
Women need fantasys, emotions, and more reasons to have sex. Man just do it. Nike.
-- Unused Nike teaser line.
I love the lines the women make in bed. "Please, not tonight I've got a headache.""Well I'm not banging your head am I?"
Do you know why God gave the sense of humor to men? So that we laugh with you instead of at you.
-- Men, General
A woman's appetite is twice that of a man's; her sexual desire, four times;her intelligence, eight times from the back, especially the blondes.
-- Sanskrit proverb (the untold one)
There's very little advice in men's magazines, because men don't need to think about stupid issues like hair, creams and other crap stuff like fashion. Women just need need to look at hotter women to feel jealous and fuel the economy.
-- Gay guy with flair for shopping
You know why God is a woman? Because if God was a man he would have made woman walk around naked and have no urges to buy accessories to cover up.
-- Prophet of God
Men remember the first blowjob long after women have given the last.
-- Blowee De Job (Singaporean writer)
A woman loses her sense of modesty after four drinks; a man needs nothing.
-- Bar Flirt.
The next line was so apt it didn''t need a rewrite.
Only three things are necessary to keep one's wife happy. One is to let her think she is having her own way, and the next is still to let her think she is having it, and lastly still letting her believe she's having it but in no way near even first base.
-- Happily married for 60 years old grandpa
God actually made man first, but got drunk and made woman.